Relational Discipleship

I have found that many Christians think about discipleship as an event to attend rather than a relationship to have. An event to attend can include things like a Bible study group, an evangelism class, or a prayer meeting. While discipleship may take place in these spaces, it is not always the case. Our personal investment in relationships matters. It is most beneficial to our spiritual growth and the growth of others when we enter these spaces with intentionality. Our intentionality to build relationships with the purpose of growing as disciples will not only transform our lives but will also grow the church.

What would it look like if you entered into these spaces with this type of intentionality? Instead of just showing up to gather more information or participate in an activity, you enter into the space with the purpose of building relationships that include accountability, spiritual growth, and shared life experiences. These types of relationships seek to help Christians grow and make disciples who are Christlike.

Essentials of Relational Discipleship:

Intentionality: Setting clear goals and objectives and regular meetings for mutual spiritual growth.

Spiritual growth: A shared commitment to know, love, and obey God as you study Scripture, apply its teachings and pray together.

Accountability: Hold one another accountable to walk worthy of the gospel by having open and honest conversations about your personal challenges and victories.

Trust & Confidentiality: Providing a safe space for sharing personal thoughts, feelings, and struggles.

Life on Life: Living life (joys & struggles) together by engaging in activities and ministry together to strengthen the relationship.

Here is an example of what that could look like:

Time in God’s Word Together

Read God’s Word and discuss using questions similar to these:

• What did the text say about God?
• What is the text teaching me about myself as an image bearer?
• What is the text teaching me about how I should think about and serve others?
• How does my life need to change if I live out and believe this truth in Scripture?

Time in Prayer

Share one another’s burdens and then take them to the Lord in prayer. Use Scripture to pray God’s Word back to him. Don’t neglect giving God thanks and praise for His goodness and for answered prayers. Be sure to spend time confessing sin together.

Time Serving in Ministry/Community Together

You could be a part of the same serving team or partner with the same local outreach partner in your community or engage in evangelism together.

Time with One Another doing Everyday Life

This can include sharing meals, birthday/anniversary/graduation celebrations, doing household chores, running errands together, etc.

The goal is to walk with Jesus together, helping one another grow as His disciples.

We can see this shown all throughout Scripture. Jesus himself was very relational in his discipleship of others. He spent time with John, known as the one he loved, he spent time with his inner circle (Peter, James & John) and he also spent time with his twelve disciples.

Another example is the relationship between Paul and Timothy. Paul encouraged Timothy in the faith and eventually he became a pillar in the early church. Not everyone we enter into a discipleship relationship will become a pillar in the church like Timothy, but when we are a part of someone’s spiritual growth it is always going to benefit the body as a whole.

However, we can’t neglect one important aspect of our intentionality in these relationships and that is found in disciple making. When we enter into these relationships we have to model and communicate the importance of multiplication. If we don’t help those we disciple see that it is their responsibility to go and disciple others then we haven’t fully experienced discipleship.

People are hungry for connection and desire to have deep relationships with others. As disciples, we should take the initiative to invite others into these types of relationships. Who is someone that is present in one of the spaces you are already participating in within your church that you could invite to grow with you? Take the next step and ask them to commit to growing closer to Jesus with you. Discuss a clear but simple plan and get started.