How to Deal With Changing Expectations on the Mission Field

This wasn’t the plan. This is not how it was supposed to be.

This was the sentiment I so often repeated to myself. Repeated in my mind as I lay awake for countless hours, unable to sleep. Repeated in my mind as I completed another puzzle, another chapter, another meaningless game of FIFA. Repeated in my mind as I checked the latest WHO statistics concerning the global pandemic that had essentially brought the entire world to a halt. A global pandemic that took me away from the country where I was serving and placed me in a new, unfamiliar country. Now ministry seemed so improbable—impossible even. Thrust into this new place where I knew no one, under pandemic restrictions that did not allow for many opportunities to evangelize or do discipleship. How was I to accomplish this task when all the training I had received had not prepared me for a moment such as this?

This wasn’t the plan. This is not how it was supposed to be.

Expectations are a part of life. Everyone who wakes up each morning will have certain expectations, whether we admit it or not. Some are small, hardly even identifiable, while others are much larger and more prominent. Sometimes we don’t even realize we have expectations until those unspoken expectations are not met. I had expectations for my term on the mission field—before I left and while I was serving. I expected that I would be in the same country for my two years, that I would only try to learn one language, that many people would be excited to hear the gospel. I didn’t expect life to be stopped by a global pandemic. But those expectations were just that—expectations—and when expectations are not met, they so often lead to disappointment.

So many of the expectations I had crashed and burned within a matter of weeks. I was left feeling frustrated and even angry at times—angry at God. I was angry at the Creator of the universe. How ridiculous is that? Well, at the time it didn’t seem so ridiculous. Actually, it felt justified. I even used Scripture to justify my feelings.

Those first few weeks in my new country, my Bible reading plan was in the book of Jeremiah, a book detailing God’s judgment against the Israelites because of their continual apostasy. As I wrestled with the reality that this part of my term was not part of the plan and was in a dark state of mind, all I gathered from the book was God’s judgment against His people. As I surveyed the current affairs around me, that is how I saw God—a harsh and wrathful God.

But fast forward to the present, and once again my reading plan has me in the book of Jeremiah. Only this time, the God of Jeremiah does not seem so harsh and wrathful. In fact, it is very clear that this God is determined to restore His people to Himself through a new covenant, despite their apostasy and rebellion. A very different reading from a few years before. How can this be, though? The words on the page hadn’t changed in just a few years, nor had the God of Jeremiah changed. The God who enacts justice against His people is the same God who desires a new covenant with His people.

It is so easy to project our current circumstances and struggles onto our perception of who God is. When what I believed should have happened a certain way didn’t happen, I placed the blame on the one I deemed responsible for not sovereignly guiding my plans—God. My expectations were not met, so I blamed Him. I thought my plans were somehow superior to His. We are unable to control all the circumstances in our lives, and that often leaves us with unmet expectations. But one thing we can control is how we respond to disappointment. We can choose to let it consume us, or we can choose to turn that disappointment over to God and trust that He will see us through.

God is Unchanging

It is easy to read through Jeremiah and see God as good and benevolent when times are good, but it was much harder when I was deep in struggle. Yet if there is one thing to remember from these two encounters, it is that God does not change in any circumstance. He does not change in our good times, nor in our times of struggle. He is the same God. That is why we can trust Him with all of our expectations. Even when those expectations shift or go unmet, we can trust Him because He never changes, and there is not a single promise He has failed to keep. We can also lament in the face of unmet expectations—expressing our sadness—while at the same time pointing to His promises.

“For I the Lord do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed.” (Malachi 3:6, ESV)

Not consumed. For I the Lord do not change; therefore, we are not consumed. A poor exegesis of the text would fail to mention that the Lord is speaking through the prophet Malachi to the Israelites, who were continuing in sin and deserving of destruction. But God, who does not change, chose not to consume or destroy the Israelites for their rebellion.

And while it might be easy to see ourselves as distant from the Israelites, we are really no different. Our sin deserves destruction just as theirs did. Yet if God could pardon the sins of the Israelites and relent from consuming them, then He can do the same for us. He has done this by sending His Son to die on the cross we deserved, paying the cost for our sins, so that we likewise would not be consumed. If God, who does this for His rebellious children because He is loving and unchanging, can we not trust Him with something as small as our expectations?

Unmet expectations and disappointment are sure to follow you to the mission field. You probably don’t realize it, but you agree to it when you sign the contract (it’s written in invisible ink). Prepare yourself now for when expectations change, and pray that God will give you the gift of adaptability.

It might be helpful to make a list of the expectations you have. Some to consider: Where do I want to live? Do I want to do ministry in a large city or in a more rural setting? What will my team or church look like? What strategies do I envision implementing? Will I have a job overseas, or will I be in full-time ministry?

Discuss your expectations with your field partners, spouse, pastor, or other trusted friends. And when those expectations do change, allow yourself to lament—but ultimately anchor yourself in Him. We can trust an unchanging God to see us through any disappointment. After all, His plans are often far better than any plan we could conceive.