Something I have wrestled with throughout my time at Judson College and Southeastern Seminary is the possibility of overseas missions. Within the first week of college, I heard the charge to ask myself, “Why should I stay?” Many of my friends from college and seminary now live overseas or are planning to go soon. I spent time overseas in college exploring the possibility of going long term. So, it may surprise you that I am approaching my third year as a worship leader in the States. Truthfully, I have never been more certain of my calling to full-time ministry in America. What is more surprising is that my wrestling with overseas missions is what God used to call me to stateside ministry. Here are three lessons I learned through asking the question “Why should I stay?”
1. Don’t be afraid to ask the question.
I can now admit that when I first arrived at Judson College in the fall of 2016, I was truly afraid to ask the question “Why should I stay?” I was a backslidden believer, and my deepest affections had been wrapped up in the things of this world for years. When I was charged to ask myself why I should stay in America, I could feel the idols in my heart begin to rage against the Spirit (Proverbs 19:3). Every good reason why the chapel speaker wasn’t talking about me came to mind, attempting to soothe the internal war I was experiencing. Paul explains what I was feeling in Galatians 5:17, “For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want”. I wasn’t opposed to overseas missions; I was opposed to giving God my heart. It was the process of beginning to ask the question, “Why should I stay?” that God used to expose and dethrone the idols I held so dear. If this had not happened, I would not be in church, leading worship, finishing a second degree, or writing this article. So don’t be afraid to ask the question. It may be the very thing God uses to change the trajectory of your life.